Monday, March 15, 2010

here it is

i havent wanted to write this entry. the following photos are hard to look at (for us, at least) but they are true. (sorry they have so much noise and the composition is off...but i am not editing them today).

we arrived in t-town on monday night and stayed with MIL. the next day, i dragged my feet in going to see mattie. we got there, and she was in bed in SIL/BIL's bed. marc walked in and saw her and walked right out. jack told me "that's not mattie" and ran away. so i sat with her in bed and talked about umizoomi.

she soon cried out to play with jack, so her dad carried her down the stairs. jack was hesitant at first, but was gentle. mattie was very grumpy due to the steroids and had a bit of a hard time, but they played well together.

although a special lunch was made for jack and mattie, my child insisted on goldfish. go figure. mattie has a morphone IV that was, of course, decked out for easter. can you see it?

mattie grew tired, and struggled, so jack tried to console her and tickle her. but it didn't work, and it was soon time to head to the car.

it was rough. i made it to the car before i completely lost it. it was really hard and i have a lot of feelings, but they are too personal to be published and judged. some of you have already heard them out loud, and that was hard enough.


  1. You and your family are always in my thoughts and prayers. I can't imagine what you're going through. ((HUGS))

  2. I cannot even begin to imagine what all you are going through...individually and as a family. My thoughts and prayers are continually with Mattie and your family.

  3. I am glad you are able to chronicle this journey however bittersweet and painful it is and will be. I know your feelings and know your thoughts. Always my love and support.

  4. Sarah, I hope you know that you, wour family and Mattie and her family are all in my thoughts and prayers daily!